When are you due?

I haven't been "due" since November 2007 when my belly fat was deemed socially acceptable because it was in fact my daughter. After her birth my inability to lose my fat-baby (which has been there since the late 1990's) was judged as decidedly lazy and undisciplined by mostly thin people.

The winter is finally over here in Montreal; that means; the coats are off, the sweaters stay in the car, the pants turn to skirts, shorts, and dresses, and the boots are replaced with sandals, flip-flops, and ballet flats. It is a rebirth of flesh and sunshine. 

I am eating healthy and walking more. I feel good in my skin. I have lost weight, toned a tad, and have that New York spring in my step. I am wearing a dress and ballet flats. It is 78 F. 

I walk into the Marche de L'Ouest in D.D.O (which is a small shopping mall filled with different kinds of stores: specialty foods, butcher, fish monger, flowers, gift items, and a new tea shop.) I walk past the new tea store. The tea hostess is offering samples of their new exotic green tea. I drink green tea daily. I am their market. Green Tea is my only source of caffeine. I take a sample from her tray and she says,

"You shouldn't drink that. When are you due?"

It hurts EVERY TIME. 

Do I just look at her and say thank you? Thank you for assuming my fat was a baby. Thank you for your thoughtfulness in protecting my unborn fat-baby. Thank you for reminding me that no matter how awesome I feel walking in here you managed to slay me with 4 small words. Do I say thank you and pat my fat-baby and give the hostess back her tea? Can I make up an imaginary fat-baby that has a gender and a due date? Maybe my fat-baby has an awesome conception story? Do I engage and tell her that I am not expecting? Then I have to see that look on her face. It is the same look every time. Terror mixed with embarrassment with a sou-son of pity because I am clearly fat enough that the assumption was made in the first place. 

Is it more important that I care about her feelings and subsequent reaction when she just crushed mine?

I cannot control where the weight disappears from on my body. I am on the right path. That is was matters. 

When will the sting come out of those words? Why is it that those words are only spoken by thin people?

Here I am with my kids, no make-up, all me. Truly happy and not feeling like I am "due".